Well, here I am again, back writing in the good old blog again. You know, I always wrote in this thing when something happend or I just really needed to get something off my chest, but this time it is different. I have something to get off my chest and something did happen, but this time I am not going to share it with the world. I have spilled my soul over and over, but it just doesn't seem to be doing me any good. I think being totally upfront and revealing has it's advantages,but it can also totally destroy you from time to time. I used to be reclusive with people, and for the time being I might be doing that again. I am sure circumstances will change, as they always do, but for now I just can't let it all out. It is strange how no matter how different the circumstances are the result always remains the same in life, there is no learning from your mistakes because they are burned into you. You do not learn from your mistakes, you are only weakend by them over time, which prevents you from doing them again. There are no mistakes, there are only poor results. It is strange how we try to change our methods, change the way we are to try to just get a moment of happiness, that is all we are chasing ....a moment of happiness. A moment where everything just seems right with the world, there is no pain, there is no way to gauge time, there is only just a comfortable happiness that we try desperately to hold onto. We can't though, we can't hold onto the moment because the second it is there it is gone.....although you never forget it. I am still searching for that moment and until I find it I will just be very empty and very alone.....and I am getting tired of being alone all the time. It is frustrating trying to live life from experiences I have never felt, trying to comprehend what I feel but always ultimately screwing it up somehow and somewhere. I don't know how to even describe it anymore, it is just such a feeling of failure but I am used to it. That sounds so strange, but I almost expect the results I get just because of history. History repeats itself in my life and history is not kind. Who knows what I should do now, all I know is that I am not sorry for what I did, I'm just sorry for the reprecussions/results. I am also tired of being sorry.

Song(s) Of The Day: "The Scientist"- Coldplay, "Miss you love"- Silverchair, "Missing The War"- Ben Folds Five, "Evaporated"- Ben Folds Five, "Wasted Years"- Cold, "Everlong"- Foo Fighters, "Losing All Control"- Rooney, "Lonely Day"- Phantom Planet, "Nothing Else Matters"- Metallica.

Thought of The Day:

Nobody said it was easy
Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said that it would be this hard
Oh take me back to the start
-Coldplay